T&L Publications

About Your NEW Password

Thank you for recently requesting a new or changed password. To assure the best security and safety these simple guidelines must be followed.


Your password.....

...Must be between 18 and 32 characters long.
...Needs to include at least two of the following elements: Uppercase, Lowercase letters and at least three numerals, plus at least one symbol. (see below for details)
...Is prohibited from having more than 2 identical or sequential characters or numbers (for example: 111 or aaa, 123, abc are not acceptable)
...Characters cannot be in any keyboard pattern order, such as QWERTY, on standard keyboard, AWOEU as on a Dvorak keyboard, 789456 as on a calculator keyboard, or 123 456 as on a telephone.
...Has to be different than your previous five passwords used anyplace and anytime before.
...Can not match your User ID, telephone number, social security number, military ID number or drivers's license
...Should not use the name or part of the name of any past financial institution (for example: MORGAN, CHASE CitiBank)
...Must not contain any resemblance to a credit card number, either in the past or present, that was assigned to you, or your family, or close friends.
...Certainly cannot be a commonly used password. (for example: anything + password1)
...Also is not allowed to have any number or name that relates to, or may relate to, any event, past present or future in your life.
...May not have names, parts of names or homonyms or synonyms that are rooted in your parents, siblings, spouse or children's names
...Forbidden also is complete or parts of present or past addresses, phone numbers or account numbers
...Although 'cute', easily guessed passwords like "ThisPasWord is 4 me!" is also may be unacceptable, at our digression.
...Must be very difficult to remember and type, because that makes it more secure.
...Can use English or other another approved language provided you have those special character keys on your keyboard.
...Would be acceptable if not more than 3 emoticons are included, but not consecutively or with similar expressions or gestures.
...Vile, foul, aggressive and abusive language is not encouraged but would be acceptable if it meets the other requirements.
...Must be hard enough that you will not remember it so that we can charge you to reset it when you forget it.

Also, please remember that any password selected must be changed on a monthly basis, and all changed passwords MUST adhere to these guidelines.
You cannot repeat or reuse any previously used password. If we detect that a password has been compromised, our fee based service will assist you in selecting a more difficult password.

We welcome to the world of Hi-Tech and its insane, and totally absurd, security.

Who still uses a Dvorak keyboard?????
Oy!

CeaSaR

Hands up...who has ever seen one?
(ps:Ever get those printers running?)

If I change my password to comply with that list, the server will go up in smoke...

➱❡✠✇ဋ✍မြ ....... That is a password !.

Yeah,
It is getting ridiculous how long, and abstract the passwords have to be.

Not to mention keeping all those passwords some place.
If you have dozens of accounts on all sorts of websites.
You need a note book just to hold them all.

If you bought into one of those; "Only One Password Needed" programs.
Your actually are leaving yourself wide up open.
Since the guy hacking at your password, only needs to crack the one password to get at all your accounts.

From what I have found....
No matter what your password is, if the hacker has the processing power.
He'll get in to your files.
Unless, you keep your private files on a computer that isn't connected to the Internet.

I don't keep; personal, credit card, bank, or SSN information on my net computer.

I've got to laugh....
When I think about the time my one brother got his IT friend to setup a professional firewall on his gaming machine.
There was nothing on the computer, but his games.
But because he was using a professional firewall.
This caught the attention of some hackers.
They banged on his firewall for several months, till they finally broke in.
But since it had nothing of value on it.
It must of p*ssed them off.
Because they completely trashed the computer.
Wiping the BIO's on the Motherboard, Video Card, and Hard drive.


Signed: Janitor Tzap

The real problem is chronic paranoia.

I should not be required to enroll and create a user name and obscure password just to look at any site.
When I am ready to buy, if I do not want to go through the user/password routine that should be my choice,
not the site's. It is really my responsibility since I chose to go there and do business.

Here's the next big paranoia pitch. Bank statements and financial documents that self destruct, like time expiring badges.
That way the sender is not liable if the customer doesn't shred the document before disposal. It's all part of the blame game.

I want vendors, merchants, and health care professionals to let ME deal with MY security issues. Their obtrusive meddling and ineffective attempts are an annoyance.

You go to a Doctor's office and there is a 'privacy notice' that you must acknowledge and then the very 'confidential' ten part questionnaire about your health history for you to muddle through. When you see the doctor, he hasn't even read it so he asks all the same questions again. It is Nuts. Do something arrogant on the form, like write in your your date of death.
Bet they don't even notice it!

LEMP
Just popped in and read your post. It took me 5 minutes to reply. I was rolling on the floor and laughing so hard, it took me a while before I could get up and hit the submit button. Great work!

passwords at work are bad enough...we have to have a password to log in,,, have to have passwords to sign into work programs,, passwords to clock in., even the passwords need passwords... it has gotten so bad that i have to write the passwords down to even remember them.. it has gotten ridiculous....
and the passwords are so complicated too..like you described in the top of the list... Ughhh..
i should copy it and send to a hand full of guys at work... watch all the purple powder blow out the top of their heads..
POOF !

Whooa...
That is a look into the future, right before your eyes

Old story:
New IT guy starts working at a big computer software security company. Boss comes by his cubicle to see how he's doing, and notices a Post-it note on his computer monitor that reads,
"^)deK76!#-cc97+*". He asks the new guy what that is, and the guy replies, "That's my password, but not exactly"!

Lenp wrote:Hands up...who has ever seen one?
(ps:Ever get those printers running?)

I've seen 1, count it 1, Dvorak keyboard in my life. Don't ask where, it was a loooong time ago. However, I think there is a picture of one in my "Running DOS 6.0" book.

As for the printers, mine had to go into storage for a while since we had relatives come live with us for a while and now that high school is finally done for both kids, we'll have room to set it up once that room gets all the school crap out of it.

Passwords: too many to count. Always used oddball alphanumeric w/special character(s) spellings of words or phrases. Yep, passbook is hidden away (gotta clean that out too, they go all the way back to 1998 - XOOM isn't a Web provider anymore, it's a UK money transfer service).

One thing the world at large has not comprehended is that with the advent of all these digital / Web services, privacy and confidentiality are a thing of the past. All it takes is a hacker (or disgruntled employee ) to get into the system and make the info public. That's a lot harder to do with a paper file locked in a cabinet in a locked room within a locked building with security. "Ain't no breaking into that cabinet from halfway around the world!"

Paper sounds pretty good, huh?

CeaSaR